Wednesday, 30 December 2020

a year of pauses



Diseases are strange. Its suddenness, unsettling. That it doesn't care about our plans. That it forces us to reset. Makes us focus on things, which are important, which count, and which remain. 

To a year which forced us to visit whom we fall back on. With whom we choose to share, most anxious of moments. With whom you drop a midnight message or a call, to just say 'this really sucks'.  

To a disease that returned some of us to our families. To make us think and yearn for people you could even risk sharing a disease, than to not be together with.  

To a year, that we would remember. 
And are yet to know if this is it.

To a year that taught us how difficult it is, when we don't have the little things around.

Wishing for you, in this coming year, the joy of holding people close you care about, again.

Of having a casual laugh, of sharing a roadside tea, 
the liberty to take a pause and say goodbye.

Wishing a decent 2021. 
Cheers! :)

Monday, 3 August 2020

Love is a strange affair

to count blessings is strange.
to know when you are broken,
there will be hands to hold
there will be unconditional hugs


to know you are considered that whatsapp dump, where a bill is dropped, just to save it for later
to share happiness of a random click and a jealous meal,
to share a laugh of a silly joke,
to share a pain of a workplace hurdle,
and when you too were lonely, to know you were the one who was sent that random message,
to ping you at 4am, to know if you are okay,
to make you apply for that job advertisement,
to share a bad haircut,
to 20 exchanges of random gifs,
to call you up when drunk.
to share a worry, to share an envy
to scold you everytime, if you haven't yet taken that steam for the cough



when life seems to push you to the wall;
to not drop the call even when there is nothing more to say
to a roommate you could cry with
who hugs you until you rest
to that friend who you can hear breaking down
because life just took a shot at you


to a family, who protects you everytime
in every way possible
for the countless sacrifices, and to smile above all pain,
just so you can share a cheer
to know having a sister who could fight the world, before any harm could come your way
to know a father, who would risk a life, before risk comes your way
and to know a mother, who would stand tirelessly strong, so that you may never fall weak


to people who were just asked to be teachers,
but who instead chose to become companions
who will throw everything to the wind
just to make sure you are okay
who video call you on an airport, tell you 'they will miss you'
to say, 'don't worry about anything else, we are here for you, we will always be'


to count blessings is a strange affair
it is to know life is not for oneself
because for everyone else around you,
it hasn't been for themselves


in the darkness and loneliness, there are often hands to hold
there will be cuddles to take a sigh
in a lonely stroll when you then sit by yourself, 
it can sometimes appear difficult;


waiting in a hospital wards can sometimes be lonely
you find someone driving all the way, saying, `care for a tea together?'
when you unknowingly stare off the balcony
to amma who passes by, asks 'nasta hua?'

an empty flat can haunt at times,
a sudden video call, 'cheers, finally i got the offer -- care for a drink together?'
when a midnight news is distressing you
a call from a different time zone, to tell you how you aren't the only one dealing with this


to know love, is to know on whom to fall back on
to people who stand beside you fighting
who cry with you in hopelessness
who know in how many millions of little ways, they help


those hands may not be immediately present at times
sometimes they might be struggling with something else
but those tired, bruised hands will come again
hold them if you can, wait for them if you can't


to love, in the worst of times
is to know, none of us is perfect,
none of us have best of times always,
but to know, there are ones, who care


Love a strange affair,
it's hard to celebrate a day,

when in every second of this life
you can't celebrate life without them


Love is a strange affair
to all those affairs of love, love.


----------


Happy friendship day, and happy rakshabandhan.
for each of those strings; those relationships you share,
May the tune always ring sweet.




Friday, 31 July 2020

tea

In a quest, in the shadows of story
In our dreams and in mundane
its the tea that seaps


in a running laughter,
in a teasing crackle
its the steam that vacates


in those broken sunshine
in that twirling rain
in that distant noise
thats the numbing sugar


lives pass by, to friendships which last
to the empty tumblers
its the tea
that still simmers.




Saturday, 30 May 2020

Institutions of pretense


A contract to stop meeting people. A forced solitude. A necessity to cut off. Why does this 
disease, strike something which is so human?

Pretense is a difficult word to justify. The negative connotation is hard to resist. The underlying ignoniminy of the ulterior is too strong a stain.

A staged protest. An act to argue. A spectacle of a meeting. A collective tea. An occasion to laugh, a genre of laughing. 

Brains need to condition to behave normally. 
Normality is a conditioning, made out of stories, recurrent. 

A nature of act, a role of pretense is as crucial as survival. Its necessary, as 
necessary to dress up. As necessary to use plates. As necessary as a formal glass of wine. 

Life is too short to not pretend. Your masks are not masks. They are skin. The gory muscle
need not be seen. Should not be seen. 

To those institutions of pretense, may you open someday;
 may the cacophony, the noise of the chatter, the cheer, the wail, the loud indecipherable noise, screach through your heads.

May the noise decend someday. 

Pretense, is a beautiful word. 

Ask the one who sells the road side snack. 
Take away his act and he will die. Its not the money, its the act.